Tuesday, June 2, 2009

My Virtual Memoir - My Dad's Brain Tumor

Summer Galitz June 2, 2009

My Virtual Memoir was driven by my driving question: In what aspects does one significant event change someone's life forever? I’m going to narrate about my father’s brain tumor and how it has changed my life:

Day 1:
I’m feeling a little nervous because I have a feeling that something isn’t right. My dad is acting slightly depressed and I could feel tension in the air between my family and me. During dinner, my dad gets a phone call and leaves the room to talk in private; something he’s never done before. When he returns my mother and father are whispering. I sense something is wrong.

Day 7:
I slept over a friend’s house and my mom calls me to come home, she wants to have a family day. I get home and my mom tells me and my two sisters to come sit down on my bed with her. She tells me my father has a brain tumor and she begins to cry. They just found out a week ago, and he is scheduled to have an operation the next week. I don’t even know what to say or think, or how to react. I just feel tears streaming down my face. My life has changed forever.

Day 14:
It’s the night before my father’s operation and I’m sitting in his hospital room eating Pollo Tropical. My Uncles and Aunts are there, and the Rabbi from my synagogue is there as well. I can’t stand sitting in that room and watching my dad lying in the hospital bed is torture for me. I have to leave the room and I cry in the hallway. The next thing I know is that I’m home in bed trying to fall asleep; but it’s so hard to sleep when you know that tomorrow is the day they operate on your father’s brain.

Day 15:
I don’t go to school and I spend the day at the hospital waiting for my dad to get out of surgery. Many hours have passed and we finally hear some good news. The surgery is complete and they take my dad to Intensive Care Unit. I can’t see him until later that night, but when I enter the ICU I freeze in panic. The room, full of hospital beds and nurses and surgeons, is a room no patient wants to be submitted to; for it is a room only for those patients who need the most intensive care. I see my father, and he is almost unrecognizable to me. He has a weird coloring to his face, and his eyes look vacant. He tries to talk but mumbles words together. He doesn’t really recognize me. I just hold his hand, and I wait for things to get better.

Day 17:
My father is still in ICU and his health is improving. He cries all the time because the tumor was in the part of his brain that when operated on causes heavy emotions. It is common for a patient with a brain tumor to be very emotional, and cry at almost everything. Seeing my father cry makes me cry. Dr. Sternau, the doctor who operated on my father visits my father. She tells him and the family that the tumor she removed was the size of a plum (they originally thought that the tumor was the size of a walnut…). Dr. Sternau marvels at how my father was able to live for so long without having a seizure or losing consciousness with a brain tumor that large. She also tells us that she isn’t one hundred percent sure if the tumor was cancerous or non-cancerous. The tumor was taken to pathology and we would find out soon whether or not it was cancerous. We all had our fingers crossed.

Day 18:
Dr. Sternau finally announces that the tumor was non-cancerous. My dad cries, I cry, my sisters cry. I couldn’t be happier. My father still has trouble talking and his memory is very shaky. He needs a lot of rehab in order to get back to his normal self. I don’t even care, I’m just happy my father is tumor and cancer-free J

Day 19:
My sisters and I are on the way to the hospital to visit my dad after school and my mom calls to tell us to not go to ICU but to meet my mom downstairs at the Mount Sinai lobby. I instantly know something is wrong. We meet my mom in the lobby, and while crying she tells us that my dad had a buildup of fluid to his brain, which isn’t too uncommon after brain surgery, and he is in surgery again to have a shunt installed to drain the fluid. Hours pass and my dad is out of surgery and placed back into the dreadful ICU.

Day 25:
My dad is still in the hospital and I have become very familiar with the cafeteria and the whole third floor. I eat chocolate Haagen Daz ice cream from the cafeteria and a Vitamin Water almost every day when I visit my dad after school. He has now been removed from ICU and put into a regular room with a nice view of the bay. His room is filled with flowers and cards and pictures, and we are all happy.

Day 28:
My dad is transferred to Miami Heart Hospital for Rehabilitation. There he learns to walk again and move his arms up and down. It’s a long and frustrating process but he improves every day. Today I get to the hospital and as I walk in my dad is having an ultra-sound on his left leg. I ask why he is having an ultra-sound and the doctor explains that he has a blood clot because he has been lying down for so many days on end. He was then put on blood thinners temporarily in order to remove the clot.

Day 42:
My dad finally gets to come home! Since he can’t walk up the stairs to get to his bedroom he rests in my bedroom which is downstairs. That night many family members and friends come over to bring dinner. Their support is tremendous and it has really helped us get through this terrible event. Things are going well until my dad begins to cough. And this wasn’t just some ordinary cough. It was a loud, terrible cough that could be heard throughout my whole house. My mom, being a nurse, knew something was wrong.

Day 43:
It’s 7:00 a.m. and my parents aren’t home. My mom left a note saying that she left in the middle of the night with my father to the hospital. Apparently the blood thinners didn’t help and the blood clot was dislodged and went to his lung. This is a pulmonary embolism and it’s very dangerous. My dad had surgery, yes another surgery, to put permanent, almost microscopic, filters into his lung. This filtered the blood clot.

Day 49:
My dad finally comes home and we all pray that it is for good this time. His health is improving, and he is slowly becoming his normal-self again. Since he is a surgeon, he can’t go back to work anytime soon because he has to be one hundred percent recovered in order to practice medicine again. This is tough financially on my family, and I start to worry about money.

Day 60:
My dad is still not at work because he isn’t fully recovered. The medical expenses were tremendous and it doesn’t help that my family isn’t getting any income. Times are tough, but at least my dad is healthy!

Day 90:
Visits to the doctor have proved that the filter that was put into my dad’s lung was faulty. An incompetent doctor broke the filter while he placed it in, and carelessly left it in there. A piece of the broken filter was dislodged and floating around in my dad’s vein. It is seriously dangerous. Just when we think that hospital visits, surgery, and illness is over, another problem pops up once again.

Day 97:
My dad is scheduled to have surgery to remove the faulty filter and replace it with a new one. It is a dangerous surgery and it has only been performed a few times before. They will do the surgery laparscopically (they won’t make any incisions; they just enter through a vein and use a very, very tiny camera to guide them to the broken filter). I’m in a really bad mood that day at school, and I’m nervous the whole day. My grandparents pick me up from school and we visit my dad. When we get there he has just gotten out of surgery and he once again is placed in the cardiovascular ICU. When I visit him he is awake and lively, and he looks very happy. The cardiovascular surgeon comes to explain that the surgery was difficult and long, and it was a very rare surgical case. However, his healthy and should recover one hundred percent.

Day 100:
My dad comes home, this time for good! Things seem to be improving, and it looks like my dad will be back at work in a month.

Day 130:
My dad is back at work but he is only doing small procedures. He isn’t doing any intense or long surgeries yet, because he wants to regain his confidence in the operating room. Also, he doesn’t have as much stamina as before, but with practice and time he will regain his endurance. I’m finally at comfort and relaxation.

It’s only been a month or two that I’ve felt like my life is back on track. This one significant event, my dad’s brain tumor, changed my life forever. It taught me new morals and it gave me a new outlook on life. I now appreciate life more, and I have more sympathy for other families who have gone through similar traumas. I am a stronger person because I have experienced this. I have learned about myself, and my family, and even my friends. My good friends shone through and stood by my side when I needed them, and this helped me discover who my true friends really were. I also matured throughout this experience, because there were many nights when I had to cook dinner for myself and be the adult because my mom would spend the night at my hospital. One time, my mom spent the entire week at the hospital without coming home. My family life was in disarray. I also learned how to maintain my good grades at school while dealing with this hardship. Often it was hard to concentrate in class because I would think about my dad’s health, and sometimes it was hard to get homework done because I spent so much time after school at the hospital. To this day, driving by Mount Sinai Hospital, gives me a nauseous feeling.
I would have days where I would be grumpy and in a bad mood because my dad being sick made me feel down. Some friends would get mad at me and tell me to stop being upset, while others would understand. My relationship with my grandparents strengthened because they visited much more and they helped my mom take care of me and my sisters. I couldn’t be happier now, and thank goodness this terrible experience ended with a great result.

Monday, June 1, 2009

Metacognition

This year, in my AP World Hisotry course, I have learned to understand how things happen and how things change, how human intentions matter, but also how their consequences are shaped by the means of carrying them out, in a tangle of purpose and process. Ms. Borchers has taught me, as well as the rest of my class, to understand the trends of human nature and the patterns of the existence of civilizations. I have learned to comprehend the interplay of change and continuity, and avoid assuming that either is somehow more natural, or more to be expected, than the other. Ms. Borchers has aided me in my attempts to interpret different civilizations, which in turn have shown me the vast similarities between the emergence, existence, and extinction of different civilizations and peoples. Ms. Borchers' teaching has helped me strengthen my skills in my study of history, and I have matured and grown in skill and intelligence as a history student. Despite all of the knowledge and skill I have acquired this year, I still have much room for improvement, and next year in my AP U.S. History course next year I hope to improve on perceiving past events and issues as they were experienced by people at the time, to develop historical empathy as opposed to present-mindedness. I think this skill is a hard one to undertake, because it is so easy, and almost natural, to have a biased opinion of present-mindedness and the "superior" modern world compared to the "inferior, less-advanced" past. I have learned more than I ever thought I would this year in my AP World History Class, and I truly enjoyed every minute of the course.

Friday, May 29, 2009

Quiz

Quiz – Waiting for Snow in Havana
1. List three conflicts and describe them
· The first conflict is between Carlos and himself. He feels conflicted in his Private School where the monks teach at because they teach him all about sin and going to hell. This is a conflict for him because he always feels like in life that he is doing something sinful that will land him in hell. This is why he was so nervous in the part of the book where he went to Confession; much to his relief he was forgiven for his sins (his kleptomania, blowing up lizards, etc…). Carlos also feels conflicted because he doesn’t understand why his father cares more about his collectibles and his antique collection then he does of his own children.
· I would say that the second conflict is between the new communist government in Cuba and the citizens of Cuba. Thousands are taken to jail, only to be thrown in front of a wall (Paredon!) and shot at by a firing squad (Sometimes they would even use blanks just to scare the prisoners). Life as Carlos once knew it was destroyed once Fidel took power, and there is much tension between the citizens and the new communist government.
· The third conflict is maybe between Carlos and God. God is mentioned a lot in this book, Carlos attended a private Catholic school, and God followed him everywhere. God was prevalent in his family and culture. He had conflicts with God because often he would want to do something that was sinful, yet he knew he shouldn’t in fear of landing in hell.

2. Choose three motifs and describe:
· Lizards – Lizards are mentioned in almost every chapter and they are very significant in the story. I think the Lizards represent the people of Cuba. They are hopeless and helpless. Carlos and his neighborhood friends would blow up the lizards without the lizards having any protest or chance to defend themselves, similar to the people of Cuba with Fidel Castro. Also, I remember in one chapter, Eire finished it by saying that a dismembered lizards tail was flapping in Castro’s project, comparing it to the people of Cuba.
· Clouds shaped as Cuba – Once Carlos moves to the States he seems over eight thousand clouds shaped as the island of Cuba. This shows his irretrievable loss of Cuba and his longing for his once blissful life there.
· Sunset – I think the sunset is a motif in the memoir because whenever Carlos talked about the “tangerine sunset” he was always happy and safe and with his family. It represents the good days, before Castro.

3. The major theme of the book is loss and longing. Carlos loses the Cuba he once knew and longs for it (this is shown in many instances of the book. Example: clouds shaped as Cuba).
The minor theme of the memoir would be forgiveness.

4. Carlos’s childhood was picaresque. An unexpected memory of his childhood to me would be:
· When Carlos was wave riding on the beach in Havana and the wave was so large and strong that it pushed him back into the sand face first. Ernesto then sat on his face and further buried him into the sand. He remembers the pain of the sand in his eyes and ears; yet he mentions his laughter afterwards.
· His memory of his rock fights with his friends and the apricot pit being thrown at his face. This is one of his greatest childhood memories; him and his brother and neighborhood friends having rock fights, while Louis XVI would watch. Yet, it was also very painful for him. Like the time the apricot pit hit above his eye. And the time that Eugenio (I think it was Eugenio) had a large rock, almost a boulder, fall on him during one of the rock fights. It was a bittersweet memory.

5. Carlos is full of forgiveness. The priest forgives him for his sins. He forgives his enemies. I remember once he even wrote something like this: “Forgive your enemy always. If they want to rape or murder you, let them. If they want to steal from you, open your pockets to them…but always forgive them.” This is part of his religion. As hard as it may seem for Carlos, he forgives Fidel and Cuba.
Eire was also very humorous in the book. His curse words and irony were very funny to me. He was very ironic, and made fun of many things. He made fun of his parents and his family in very humorous ways. He made fun of the Revolutionaries and Fidel (he saved them all from being gay.) His irony was very funny to me.

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Quote

I really like Carlos's quote: "Dying can be beautiful and waking up is even more beautiful. Even when the world has changed."
I think this really sums up one of the main themes of the book.
Also: "Have mercy on me Lord, I am a Cuban."
I found a really good book review of the book:
http://archives.umc.org/interior.asp?mid=5010

My response to Jill's Memoir

You're memoir is really touching and very well written. I really got a good look into the lives of Jews during the Holocaust and it was a very good and realistic portrayal of the emotions and life was like during that time. I can't imagine what it must have been like to be a Jew during this time, being verbally and physically abused, wathcing your fellow Jews being killed in front of you, and being prosecuted just for your religion. I think it's amazing that your grandmother is a survivor of the Holocaust and the story was very touching. I especially thought that Chapter 6, your grandmother's description of her first night in the ghetto, was especially moving.

Chapter 29

Bombing and gunfire are in this chapter and it frightens Carlos and his family. This is the beginning of a rude awakening of the communism in Cuba. Also, Carlos and his friend are picking flowers and cars pull up and begin shooting each other. The police question Carlos and this scares Carlos because he's afraid that they are going to take him off to jail just like they did to Fernando and Filo.
Fernando's experiences in jail were really scary and saddening. It's even more sad that they would tell Filo that the gunshots he was hearing were his son being shot. This, along with other experiences, makes Filo go mentally insane and changes him as a person forever.

My e-mail to Yoani Sanchez

Hola Yoani,
Me llamo Summer, y soy un estudiante en el decimo grado en Miami Country Day School. Tengo algunas preguntas sobre tu vida en Cuba. En mi clase de historia estamos aprendiendo del comunismo en Cuba y la crueldad de Castro. Me gustaria saber historias de gente que han intentado huir de Cuba. Tambien me gustaria saber de la opresion que el gobierno causo en las vidas de algunos Cubanos. Muchas gracias por leer mi mensaje y espero escuchar de ti pronto.
Gracias, Summer

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

chapter 27 and 28

Carlos writes about Fernando's experiences in prison for twenty-something years. I couldn't imagine what it must be like to be in prison for that long, and to have to be shot at by the firing squad not knowing whether the bullets are blank or real.

Students and teachers are disappearing from Carlos's new school (he had to transfer schools because of the danger of being acknowledged as a first class citizen in Cuba). Carlos encounters his first love in fifth grade.

chapter 25

Carlos is prohibited by the Cuban government to see 20,000 leagues under the sea, even though he has seen it multiple times before. This stripping of freedom infuriated Carlos and only foreshadows how the freedom of all Cubans is diminshed.
"It was there, on that sidewalk, standing next to a well-worn poster for 20,000 leagues under the sea, bathed in the light of the marquee, that i first felt that repuslive feeling of someone trying to invade my mind and soul. It was the first lancing. The blade of Fidel's scalpel had attempted the first incision, the first step towards the gradual head transplant." (pg. 244)

Chapter 23

We see young Carlos's desire to leave Havana and move farther north, to the snow and the cold and the darkness. Perhaps he was influenced from Western movies and the thought of Christmas. He mentioned that his father should have been smart and left Havana the first second Fidel came into power. His father even recognized the destruction Fidel would bring. Yet he stayed in Havana with the things that are most important to him: his art collection.

Carlos's Transformation

Carlos becomes a mature young adult in chapter 21 and 22. His innocence is no longer prevalent. He catches himself glimpsing at the topless bar on walks home from work in Chicago. He never would have done this before, and he understands that it is a sin, but temptation persuades him to look. Also, in chapter 22 Carlos talks with complete admiration and obsession when he mentions blonde American movie stars like Marilyn Monroe and Kim Novak. He is no longer an innocent young boy; he has transformed into a teenager.

Chapter 21

The chapter opens with Carlos many years later in Chicago freezing in the cold winter. His description of the cold, and the Underworld-like Subway station, and the mucus dripping from his nose makes the reader feel like his life is no longer good without Havana. Everything seemed brighter and happier in Havana, and more gloomy and somber in The States. Carlos says he has come a long way from Cuba, but it seems like there is some irony in that statement, since he seems to be upset about it, instead of joyful.
I also found this chapter very sad. It was sad to learn of the such harsh life Carlos, Tony and Marie Antoinette now had to go through. Carlos had to work all week at night, go to school, and manage to do all his homework. It must have been a very tough life. Tony also worked non-stop. And Marie Antoinette couldn't get a job because she didn't speak english, she was crippled, and she had no working experience. Their lives seemed glum and depressing, and it's so sad to me that one man, Castro, could change a whole family like this forever.

Chapter 20

After the happy and delightful Christmas, the chapter ends on a more somber note. Fidel's victory is just around the corner, and this marks the beginning of chaos in Carlos' and Havana's life. The victory of Fidel over Cuba is the foreshadowing of the destruction of their world and the gracious submission of the people of Cuba. Foreshadowing is prominent in this chapter.

Lizards

Lizards are really symbolic in this book, and they appear many times throughout the novel. I have noticed that in chapter 20 lizards are mentioned quite a lot in similes: ""He showed no surprise, no concern, nothing at all. Just like a lizard" (pg. 189).
Another: "...like the lizards who fall off trees onto the shoulders of white-haired grandfathers and are swiftly brushed off. Just like lizards, I'm afraid." (pg. 192).
Chapter 17 ends with: "And behind me, in the inky darkness, my tail was flapping like mad in Fidel's pocket" (pg. 161). Carlos is comparing himself to a dismembered lizard's tail.
Also, Carlos watched chameleons change colors all the time, which led him to believe that by eating dark colored (brown or black) foods his skin would turn black. This frightened young Carlos.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

my thoughts on chapter 15

King Louis XVI to me is a very unique individual. He believe he was Louis XVI in his past life, and he apparently knows the past lives of others. Lousi XVI also can see ghosts and talk to the spirits of the dead. Carlos's family also seem to be hypochondriacs. They believe that you could get cramps and strokes while swimming without your food fulling digesting and dying; they also believe that ridiculous things (like not wearing an undershirt) could make you get pneumonia and die.

chapter 14

This chapter, about sins, reflected the naivety and innocene of young children. Depsite his theft, pride, and other sins, he is still so naive and ignorant. His going to confession and confessing for all of his sins felt "like a leap of a cliff, blindfolded" (pg. 130). Carlos would say later in his life, while living in America that being a Cuban is the root of all of his problems. I wonder what it is like to believe that your own nationality is a disgrace and a problem that should be concealed. I would hate to be ashamed of my own culture and nationality. Reminding Carlos that he is a Cuban wounds his pride. It's really unfortunate that he has to be ashamed.

chapter 13

This chapter talked about luck. It talked about luck throughout Carlos's family (it doesn't seem like there was too much luck) and it talked about death and fear and starting over. We learn that Carlos has a fear and a hatred for reptiles (especially lizards, snakes, frogs...) and he inherits this hatred from his Aunt Lola.
I love how despite the burning down of Carlos' granfather's home, the death of his daughter, the burning down again of his home, the loss of his lottery ticket in the fire, the bank failure in 1929, Che Guevara seizing all his money, he still managed to stay happy and start all over again. He always started again, and with a smile. I think this is a good lesson to learn.
I find it amusing that Antonio, or rather Louis XVI believes he knows people from other lives and has himself been reincarnated. When he met his beloved wife, the supposed Marie Antoinette, he stops at no means to court her and make her his wife. I like his passion and persistence. Clearly, he really believes that she was once his wife in a past life.
I have to admit that after reading this chapter I am also a little bit afraid of licking an envelope.

chapter 11

I really enjoyed chapter 11. Carlos's description of him being sucked into the massive wave and buried in the wet sand, and Ernesto sitting on his head made me feel like I was in Cuba standing right next to him, watching the scene take place. I think his description is amazing. I think the boys are comical, despite their malicious and incessant pranks and even bullying.

Everything about Havana seemed to be great: "Great Storm. Great Waves. Great Beach. Great parents who let us play in killer surf. Great beach club that let us in for free and allowed us to bring as many guests as we liked..." (pg. 91). Carlos seemed to have had a great and enjoyable childhood. I also really enjoyed the church scene in this chapter. I thought it was interesting how he compared an optical illusion like the glass/two faces to the round shapes in the wooden pews. He was so interested in them that he even got his head stuck and disturbed the entire church sermon. Carlos then goes on to add a philosophical meaning to his near suffocation in the sand by Ernesto and his head being stuck in the pew.
So far I am really enjoying Waiting for Snow in Havana.
It really saddens me however, how much Havana has changed, and for the worse. When Carlos describes the amount of wealth present at that huge birthday party he went to,it shocked me at how much Havana has changed due to Castro. The birthday party seemed amazing, and the house seemed huge and beautiful. All of the presents, and cars, and the tropical oasis of the estate made it seem like a wealthy paradise. And Havana was once a wealthy paradise.
I like how Carlos describes fireworks and all of his experiences with them. The time he held a dud in his hand and it blew up, the time they tried to send the lizard to orbit the earth, and all the other crazy experiences he's had with them. I think Carlos writes his memoir in an easy-to-read, nonchalant way that is really entertaining. I enjoy reading about his memories, and it's interesting to me to get a taste of the old, wealthy, and brilliant Havana.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

My Driving Question

My driving question is:
In what aspects does one significant event change someone's life forever?

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

My thoughts on Havana Movie

Watching the movie today in class really opened my eyes to life in Havana, Cuba. I couldn't believe how the previously beautiful, lively, and incredible city of Havana could turn into a ghost-town after Fidel Castro came into power. Seeing the ruins of once beautiful and popular streets and shopping and dining areas really made me realize how much negativity communism has brought to Cuba. It's as if it were a different city now. What startled me was when he mentioned that the beer he was drinking would've taken a doctor two weeks of his salary to pay for. People could barely survive over there, there is no future for anybody, and even being a professional and educated person was worthless. "We Are Happy" was written on walls and places around the city to make the citizens believe that they truly are happy, even though they are far from it. I find it ridiculous that Castro would write this on walls, as if to brainwash his citizens into believing that they are living happily. Also the "Socialist or Death" billboards and graffiti again showed the government's involvement in every aspect of it's citizens lives.
It was sad to see how beautiful Havana once was. It was also sad to see undercover restaurants trying to survive while trying to remain hidden from the police. I couldn't imagine living in a society where even people for owning restaurants or shopping stores were punished. The movie was a great way for me to get a taste of real life in Havana under communist rule.